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Using Dreams in Spiritual Direction

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Recently a friend of mine described a peculiar event in her life. While attempting to parent her teenage son during an emotionally charged situation, she blurted out a series of statements that she not only regretted but did not reflect her true personality. “I don’t know where they came from. It’s like I was possessed or something.”

Have you ever had an experience similar to this one? I know I have. In response to something that was said or done, it’s as if I had lost my mind. Another example might be when you find yourself listening to someone in a meeting and you notice that what they are saying makes no sense at all and even contradicts their own values. I saw this recently when someone was defending their position on a personal medical issue. As they explained to me their thinking, it simply defied all sound reasoning, yet it made ‘sense’ to them. One more example: You walk into a room (a meeting, a classroom, a church, a Zoom session) to listen to a guest speaker. After about a minute or two, you have a really strong reaction. It may be positive such as almost falling in love or considering this person to be the wisest human ever to live. It may be negative, and so strong you just despise the person and think all their points are worthless. What’s going on here? You’ve only been listening for 60 seconds.

It’s as if something else is influencing us. Could it be that there are forces inside us and around us that influence our waking lives? I’d like to use a metaphor to explain that influence. That metaphor is best illustrated by the image of an iceberg.

As you can see from this photo, the vast majority of the iceberg is not above the waterline, but below. Depth Psychologists refer to this submerged part of the iceberg as the unconscious. Above the waterline is our conscious selves, that’s the part we show to the world, take to work, and think is in charge. It’s gone by different names depending on the school of thought: ego, persona, conscious self. Notice what’s underneath the waterline. Notice the size of the unconscious. It’s outsized in proportion to the tiny part we present to the world each day. Do you think it might be influencing us? You bet it does. But here’s the thing, because it’s under the water because it’s the unconscious we don’t know about it. Plus the ego or persona has done a great job of convincing us that the part above the waterline is in charge. The ego thinks it’s the CEO of our lives.

Yet, we see the unconscious spring up from time to time as in the examples I mentioned at the beginning. One of the keys to growing as a person through life’s stages is becoming more aware of those influences that are under the surface of the waterline. It’s my contention that spiritual maturity includes exploring this submerged region of our being.

One of the avenues I’ve found most helpful is Dreamwork. Our dreams are messages, cinematic neurochromes (as in mindful Kodachrome film) that convey via story and images glimpses of our unconscious. All humans dream, and it’s very likely most mammals dream as well. In fact, some anthropologists suspect that dreaming may be the origin of religion in the evolutionary development of homo-sapiens. Those dreams may then have been communicated around campfires, and then joined with the rituals of dance and song that shaped early human life. All of this is to suggest, maybe dreams can be a helpful vehicle in our own spiritual development.

Dreams are certainly part of both the Hebrew Bible as well as the Christian New Testament. Kelly Bulkelly’s Dreaming in the World’s Religions demonstrates the wide variety of dreaming in Hindu, Buddhist, African, Islamic religions as well as Judaism and Christianity. Depth psychologists, particularly CG Jung, have demonstrated the significance of dreams as pathways to growth and maturity. In a podcast, last fall, I spoke with author and psychotherapist Jason Smith about the many intersections between dreams, symbols, and religious life.

In the last thirty years, that I’ve been working with my own dreams, I’ve learned better ways of engaging with difficult people, grown in my practices of prayer and discovered methods for healthier and holistic living. I’ve also learned about those aspects of my personality that are not so helpful to others. It’s been a rich time of growth and maturing…and I’ve still got a long way to go.

Through my study and practice with the Haden Institute as well as years of dreamwork on my own and with various guides, I’ve come to see exploring dreams as a profoundly significant tool for spiritual growth. Some of my most profound spiritual maturation has occurred in dreams and the subsequent lessons I’ve learned from them.

Previously Published on jameshazelwood.net

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